


Kiss Before Death

by Queerking



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, Howling Commandos - Freeform, Kisses, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, World War II
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-09
Updated: 2016-02-09
Packaged: 2018-05-19 10:34:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5964169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queerking/pseuds/Queerking
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky kisses Steve before they go off into battle.</p><p>It's strange how Steve can love something he hates so much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss Before Death

**Author's Note:**

> So this story isn't really compliant to Aou, except the avengers base at the end and that Sam joins them, nor is it Civil War compliant.

It started during the war.

When the team first started off and knew they'd be up for a new mission, a bar was found for what was unspoken, a last drink.

Steve thought it was morbid, but hey, they might as well. While he believes in his men, too many other obstacles could fail them. If drinking was what they wanted, Steve wasn't going to deny them that.

A tradition that also kinda started was that Bucky requested a great big kiss from any woman willing, said it was "a good luck kiss". All the guys and women would hoot and rave about it, tease the girl and pat Bucky on the back.

Long used to the slight ping of want, Steve just sat at the bar and smiled at his friend, glad that at least he was having fun.

However, about the fifth time around in Paris, all the girls were already settled with a fella, and there were probably about 7 of them meaning girls that night were scarce.

Drunk, Dum Dum hollered, "Why don't you give our lonely Captain a good luck kiss instead?"

Of course, by this point, everyone was drunk too, so they cheered and laughed. Steve blushed and smiled sheepishly, trying not to cause a bunch of drunks to whine.

Yet, his men didn't give way, cajoling the Sergeant and Captain into a kiss.

Bucky huffed a laugh, sauntered over to his friend and shrugged, "Whadda ya say, Cap? Kiss to win the war?"

Steve smiled and shook his head, "Sure, Buck. Why not."

Grinning, Bucky stepped forward, grabbed Steve's tie and tugged him into a chaste kiss.

It was hardly a second, but to Steve it was everything. It wasn't ever in his fantasies, and yet, now, it would be all he'd think about.

With his luck, it's not likely it'll happen again.

The crowd cheered, joked and got more sloshed. Bucky seemed to be enjoying himself, as usual, as well as the team.

Steve smiled to himself and considered his first and only kiss with Bucky worth it.

...

Those men never put anything behind them. That night started a tradition Steve never thought he'd have to prepare for.

The next mission they go on, the guys encourage another kiss from the two, seeing as it gets things fun and jovial.  


Both Steve and Bucky smile and shrug, their lips meet for a brief moment again.

And again. And again. And again. And again.

Until, after their eleventh mission, they get a telegram that they are to go straight into another trip. No time for the nearest bar.

Jones gives them the idea to set up a campfire and drink on their own, seeing as their not gonna be going to a club, bar, or pub anytime soon.

Well into the night, the boys are sleepily buzzed, it was a good time of joking, sharing stories, and playing cards.

When Steve suggests they should head out to bed, the men put up one protest of, "What about the lucky kiss?"

Bucky laughs, "You guys are still on that?"

"I think we're well onto our way of a superstition by now. I don't wanna find out what happens when you two don't," Dugan claims, smirking.

Steve's ready to sleep, so he settles, "If I kiss his ugly mug, will you all get some shut eye?" To which the men agree in murmurs and nods.

Quickly, Steve firmly grips his friends face and plants one on him.

"Happy?" He asks getting up.

"That we ain't dying tomorrow? You bet," Gabe answers. "I'm on first watch tonight fellas."

Bucky snorts and gets up, too. The rest of the guys slowly follow suit.

It's only until Steve's laying on his sleeping roll of what he's realized just what he's signed himself up for.

A kiss from Bucky before every mission.

...

Somewhere in their adventures does Steve still love their superstition, but also loathes it.

Yes, before they go off into danger, does Steve get to kiss the love of his life, but it's not enough. 

Steve grew up fine knowing he'd never have his feelings reciprocated. But now this is just torture. Getting the bare minimum of what he wants.

However, these are just very little pocket thoughts, he is in no way actively complaining. When he has a small bit of time alone does he become alarmed that he's alone in this. 

Their tradition has been going on nearly since the beginning of his time over here, and Bucky has made no indication that he feels anything for Steve.

There's no passion in the kiss, no heat. It's chaste and done before anyone can blink.

Although, the longer this goes on, the harder it gets. The more pain that comes along with it.

Well, by that point, Steve's resigned himself to it.

...

Freezing cold air whips past his head. The mountains are a horrendous place to be, in Steve's opinion. They're just about to infiltrate the train Zola was said to be on.

"Remember when I made you ride the Cyclone at Coney Island?" Bucky asks him.

"Yeah, and I threw up?"

"This isn't pay back for it?"

Steve smirks at him, "Now why would I do that?"

Gabe fills them in on what they suspected. Zola should definitely be on that train.

"You better kiss him fast, that train is moving like the devil," Monty informs them.

Grinning, Bucky pulls Steve in by one of his many straps and hauls him in for a kiss.

Except- 

Except, this time, it lasts. Bucky lingers. For the life of him, Steve can't fathom why Bucky lingers, but he does.

When they pull apart, Bucky says, "Extra good luck, we're gonna need it." He lightly smacks Steve's cheek.

Steve smiles at his friend. They leave.

That was a kiss to be savored. It was nice. It had something about it. As always, Steve loved their small pecks, yet hated them. This one. This one he loved. Only loved.

Good thing, too.

It was the last one.

...

Steve hates himself, it's selfish and horrible but - he wished his last kiss hadn't been with Peggy, the girl he was suppose to marry, the girl he loved but didn't.

He wishes he could have died with the one good kiss Bucky left him with.

So, Steve waits. He'll meet Bucky at the gates and give him a huge kiss. He'll get his best friend. If that's not heaven, then Steve wants no part of it.  


The last moments are filed with thoughts of short brown hair, ice blue eyes, a mix of musk and cigarette smoke, and a sinners pair of lips.

Then the cold gets in. And the salvation of nothing knocks him out.

...

When Steve gets a moment to himself, when the men in black gear and suits heed his request of leaving him alone, it's filed with anger and tears and yelling and throwing of the table in front of him and the chair. Thankfully no one comes in.

If they did, they'd hear sobs of a broken heart from a broken man.

...

It's the year 2016 and Steve is alright.

The team is slightly broken up because of personal lives, but they know that if it comes down to it, they'll get back to up and fight the good fight.

Steve has been left in charge, along with Natasha and Sam.

And Bucky. Sorta. He's more of a consultant with a slight interest in getting back into the field.

It's nice. Things could be better. They could all be more stable. That would certainly lessen nightmares.

Yet, Steve is content. They've all gotten a bit closer and honestly that's what he's needed, a system of sarcastic supportive friends. They're all broken and rebuilt people, but they have each other.

Bucky's gotten better. Still complains that his head is too noisy. Too many things going on, like when will Hydra die, when will the world stop needing them, his arm is whirring, there's a person approaching, they're leaving, files need to be done, another mission needs to be found and dealt with, more, more, more, more.

But, they're working on it. Bucky remembers their old life and his dead one.

Except, there's something off about their friendship. It's as if they're both tip toeing around the other, waiting for the snap of their okay environment.

It's on a mission in Chicago actually that fixes it. Because they're too dumb to fix it themselves.

It's the first mission Bucky has clearance from Sam to go on. They're sitting in the quinjet, idly chatting. Then Natasha.

"Oh hey, Steve, there's this girl in technical engineering who I think you'd like," she tells him.

Steve gives her a smile, "Why do you think that?"

"Because she is tough as hell and twice as pretty. I've noticed you don't exactly mind strong women. Probably prefer them." Natasha smirks.

"You know that for a fact?" Steve raises an eyebrow.

"Of course. There was Agent Carter, Sharon, and you didn't mind kissing me."

That makes Steve chuckle while it makes Sam and Bucky squawk.

"When?" Sam asks incredulously.

"I think it was when they first put out the manhunt for me and her. Rumlow nearly had us cornered on an escalator with the rest of the STRIKE team. But Nat saved the day-"

"-as always," she adds.

"-And gave us a good distraction." Steve smiles at her, feeling proud.

"Where as you nearly pissed yourself when I barley gave you a peck," she laughs and Sam joins her.

Bucky is quiet, but he's smiling softly.  
Steve holds his hands up and shakes his head, "In my defense, I wasn't exactly prepared. According to you, I'm dead and hadn't kissed anyone before you."

"Whatever, you're just probably just too intimidated by her," Sam says.

"That sounds more correct," Steve agrees.

They start talking about other things like getting a company pet, just letting a dog roam around the compound, or a couple of cats lazing about the offices. They veto Sam's idea of rats because, while they're cute, they'd be too small to take care of and keep track.

Then, they start talking about pets on Asgard, then to talking about the place itself, and how much they miss Thor.

When they start nearing Chicago, they start to talk strategy. A couple of scientists have managed to accidentally create an army of large lizard-snake hybrids. So far venomous and dangerously erratic. The lab will definitely be charged with animal cruelty.

Bucky is to be taken high up by Sam to snipe any hybrids from the ground and to keep them from scaling the buildings or getting to Natasha and Steve, who will be covering the ground and protecting civilians who haven't been able to evacuate.

Sam will be helping Bucky, but flying high and low to eradicate the creatures. Also put on stand by if anyone on the ground needs medical attention.

No hybrid survivors are to be taken, they cannot be controlled. Further experimentation on them is prohibited and any persons will face imprisonment when caught.

Grimly, everyone agrees on tactics and guidelines and start gearing up.

It's 7 minutes before arrival that Bucky calls for Steve.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" He nods his head to the back.

Slightly concerned, Steve approaches him at the far end of the transport.

"What's up, Buck?"

Bucky smiles shyly, "So, uh, Natasha. She got me thinking about something. I remembered a while back, but I didn't think it'd be - I don't know, worth it to bring up?"

"Well, first off, that's dumb, everything you remember is important, even the bad stuff. And especially the embarrassing stuff," Steve smirks at him.

Bucky huffs, "Yeah definitely. Well, I uh. I remembered that, before every mission with the old guys." He rubs the back of his neck, "You'd give me a kiss for good luck."

Immediately, Steve blushes from his ears to his toes, "Ah, yeah. That did happen. The guys wouldn't let it down because of-"

"-Superstition, yeah. I remember." Bucky smiles at him.

Steve clears his throat and looks away, "Good. It's good you remembered that. Good times."

"Steve."

Steve looks up at his friend and finds soft eyes staring at him.

Bucky's smile slides into a grin and he shrugs, "Well, whadda ya say? Gimme a kiss to win the war?"

The thing is, Steve would have said yes in a heartbeat. But it's just, "You died last time." He said, frowning. "Hell, Peggy kissed me before I went off to face Schmidt and I died." 

Tentatively, Bucky steps closer and takes Steve's hand, "I don't know if you've noticed, but we're both alive."

For a long moment, Steve just looks at him, thinking it over. This time, things feel different. It doesn't seem like an endless pattern of something he'll love but wish for the world it would stop. This feels real now. Yet.

"We're gonna have a talk when we get back," Steve finally answers.

Bucky grins wider, "Oh, you can count on that." With that, he pulls his best friend into him, their lips meeting softly, but with passion. 

It's no more than a five second kiss, but this time, it feels like everything is as it's supposed to be. It's not at all how he'd imagined it would go. For one thing, they're about to go fight genetically altered lizard-snake things, another is that one of the hands that's moved to Steve's waist is now metal, and also one of his best friends can fly. But it feels right. 

However, another squawk from Sam breaks the two apart. 

"What the hell? This is happening now? I turned around for like four minutes and everyone's kissing the Captain. Well fuck that, I sure as hell ain't kissing you," Sam crosses his arms. 

Natasha turns around from whatever she was doing to grin at the pair who are still embraced, "For the record Sam, I kissed Rogers months ago. Anyways, parachutes on. We're about to jump," She says, but not without winking at them. 

Blushing, Bucky and Steve step away from each other, suddenly bashful. Steve goes to get his chute while Bucky goes to get prepared to take off with Sam. 

When they're all set, they all go to the back to jump out. 

...

Unfortunately, Steve was worried about the mission when he landed. Although, he has good reason. Last time Bucky kissed him, he lost him. 

But the mission went fine, all the creatures put down, they kind of evaporated as soon as they were shot, which was weird, but eliminated a long clean up. Back on the plane, they were all peacefully quiet, napping or cleaning themselves up with wet wipes. Steve and Bucky didn't talk on the craft, but did sit close to each other to rest. 

When they got back to the Avengers compound, the group went in to go for a quick debriefing. Quick as in, it only lasted nearly an hour. 

Steve went to his quarters, followed by Bucky, who lived conveniently across the hall. There's a moment where they stand in there, between their doors, silently trying to decide if they should talk now. 

"We should-"

"Maybe we-"

They spoke at the same time, and laughed. Steve held up his hand, signaling his talking.

"I think it'd be a good idea if we showered, then talked over dinner."

That made Bucky smirk, "You asking me out on a date, Rogers?"

Steve smiled and went for his door, "And if you behave, maybe more than that." That pleasantly left Bucky gaping at him, so he quickly made his exit.

...

After the two men had their hot showers and dressed in comfortable clothes, Steve started cooking dinner.

Bucky came in right about the time Steve just got done with the last ingredient for chili. For a good five minutes, Steve stirred while Bucky chose a song to play in the background. Soon, some soothing jazz trilled out of the speakers.

Suddenly, the mood became more romantic than it was nervous a moment ago. It certainly makes things a bit easier to talk about. However, for now, just small talk.

"So how about those new agents?" Bucky muses as he sets the table.

Steve huffs a laugh, "I'm hoping they'll get through it. I need to set up a retirement plan."

That makes Bucky chuckle, "The day you stop fighting is the day Sam shits out an egg and Clint claims to be the father."

This statement makes the two dissolve into a laughing fit.

Bucky calms down first, though still smiles as he makes his way to the little cubby where Steve keeps his small wine collection, "Can't deny it though." To which Steve hums his agreement.

Carefully, Bucky pours them two glasses of a nice chardonnay.

"Alight, time to eat," Steve announces.

Very hungry, they get their bowls and prepare their food, then sit down to eat. Usually it's a strange quiet affaire with just the two of them, unless sometimes someone else joins them. But tonight, it's finally comfortable.

When their food is eaten, like the emotionally stunted men they are, they both sit for a good 4 minutes trying to figure out how to start. However, they start at the same time. Again.

"When did-"

"How come-"

Chuckling, Steve gestures for Bucky to speak, who seems a bit reluctant.

"Look, Steve. Don't gimme that look - hear me out." Bucky held up his hands in a placating gesture when Steve's brow furrows, "I'm gonna be honest. For me, all those kisses weren't for luck. I mean, that's what I kept telling myself at first. But I just, I don't really remember when it stopped being that. And I'm not saying that as in, I fell into it, this - no I always. Fuck."

Tiredly, Bucky runs a hand through his long hair. "Gosh. Okay, cards on the table I guess. I've always been crazy about you." Finally, he looks up, expecting a frown. Instead it's a mix of awe and adoration.

"So those two last kisses. Few good hits until it's over?" Steve asks quietly, a small smile lighting up his face. 

"Anyone could see a mile away that we were winning the war. Figured, we'd only have a few more trips until then. And earlier, yeah, figured then I'd only get one more shot," Bucky affirms.

"To clarify, you want this?" Steve waves a hand between them, "A relationship."

Bucky smiles and looks down, "Yeah, you're kinda it for me."

"That's good, because you're kinda it for me too." With that, Steve pulls himself up from his chair to quickly make his way to Bucky, to crush their lips together in an over due, legitimate kiss.

It's a start.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my friend Marty for beta-ing they are great. 
> 
> If you want to talk about Bucky and Steve with me and cry I'm Dave at queers-of-kings.tumblr.com

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] Kiss Before Death](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7446394) by [Queerking](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queerking/pseuds/Queerking), [shadow_chasing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadow_chasing/pseuds/shadow_chasing)




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